“Are you Worried about How Your Divorce is Impacting Your Children?”
“Do you want to Stop Managing Your Former’s Relationship with Your Children?”
Discover the Secrets to Support Your Children During and After Divorce, and Ensure Your Children are Not Pawns in Your Divorce, so You Create a Safe House for Love where You and Your Children Can Thrive

From: Cat Zavis
Bellingham, WA USA

Dear Parent, 

If you are like me, then you yearn for more peace and ease in your life. And you know you are ready to create that. 

You dream of having a home where you and your children have fun and ease, where you and your former have clear agreements so your children aren’t placed in the middle, and everyone can sleep peacefully at night.

But . . . if only it were that easy! 

Knowing how to support your children during and after divorce can feel hopeless and overwhelming

You’re probably struggling with:

  • “How do I stay calm when my Ex yells at me?”
  • “What do I do when I lose my temper?”
  • “I’ve done all I can. What else can I possibly do?”
  • “What can I do to protect my children?” 

If any of these questions have gone through your mind, you are not alone.  

If you’ve tried to change your interactions with your Former with disappointing results. . .  

Or if you’re unclear how to respond to your children when they complain about your Former. . .  

And if your current way of dealing with the situation is not working for you and/or your kids . . .  

I would be honored to help you transform your interactions and make your relationship with Former and children healthier so you and your children thrive.

What inspired me to create the Parenting Effectively Through Divorce Program. . .

Cat leading a small Nonviolent CommunicationSM break-out session for parents

In just 5 years I have transformed my life. I have taught Nonviolent Communication to hundreds of parents, professionals, couples, teachers and students, have mediated hundreds of divorces, family conflicts and break-ups, and have represented dozens of individuals in collaborative divorce cases.

My children and I have a fun and loving relationship and I know how to support them so they are not put in the middle.

I am able to communicate effectively with my former, uncover the shared goals hidden in our disagreements, and find ways to meet my needs regardless of his choices.

And, to boot, I have a thriving business that I love in which I am honored to contribute to the well-being of parents and children.

But it wasn’t always this way. . .

“Just 5 years ago, I left my husband. . .”

For many years, I was happily married. But after our children were born, we began to disagree and fight about basic parenting issues. Somewhere along the way, we lost each other and could not easily find our way back. I realized our communication was ineffective so I worked to improve my communication skills.

I decided I was going to do whatever it took to improve our relationship. So I enrolled in Nonviolent CommunicationSM trainings, read books, and dragged my husband to counseling sessions. After trying for over 3 years to improve our communication, I left my husband.

That is when I began the roller coaster ride of divorce. A ride I thought I could navigate with grace and ease given all the tools I already had in my toolbox. Boy was I surprised!

At first things sailed along pretty smoothly but eventually we began disagreeing about parenting decisions and other problems arose. He was making decisions that were not in the best interest of the children and yet I knew they were not of the caliber that the court would act upon.

Over the course of the last 5 years, my ex has often refused to communicate with me, and sworn at me in front of our kids. He even yelled at me at my son’s basketball game in front of other parents and kids.
I was so stunned I was unable to say or do anything in response. All I could do was walk away in tears.

The tension between us began to affect our kids. And I feared that my older child was slipping away.

This was a LOUD wake up call.

I realized I couldn’t continue the way I had . . . and I took a serious look at what I could do to change the dynamic in my relationship with my son and with my former.

There were many times I wanted to give up and just yell back. Yet I knew if I acted the same way he did our children would suffer even more. When faced with this reality, I realized I had to do something.

“I didn’t want to treat him the way he treated me and I wanted a safe house for love for my kids.”

So I committed to further stretching and growing MYSELF so I could be confident that at every roadblock I was choosing my response based on my needs and goals rather than reacting from my own pains and hurts. 

I re-committed myself to a daily meditation practice. And I integrated deep breathing techniques and began witnessing what was happening in my body so I could quickly end a conversation if I felt unsafe or could not trust my ability to remain calm.

“Deep inside I knew I had the ability to live in integrity with my values even when challenged.”

To help me do this, I deepened my skills and training in Collaborative Divorce and Mediation and combined those with my previous training in Nonviolent CommunicationSM. Through my work with my clients and my relationship with my former and my children, I realized that there were specific skills needed for parenting through and after divorce so parents could support their children without placing them in the middle.

So I took the best skills, methods and practices from these various disciplines to create a system to help me parent after divorce with greater ease and inner peace.

I now have the inner strength, clarity, and resolve to parent my children with love and to provide clear boundaries with my children and my former. And when I am challenged beyond my ability, I rely on my community to support me.

“And it just keeps getting better.”


Cat’s office with an amazing view of the Bellingham Bay

The more I practiced these skills, the calmer I felt when interacting with my former and my children and the more I was able to have compassion and understanding for all of us. I could see and hear the pain in their anger while simultaneously holding space for my hurt and pain.

From that place, I am able to express my wants, wishes and goals and emphasize our shared needs rather than our places of disagreement. Over time, my interactions with my former have become more peaceful and my children are thriving. While we don’t see eye-to-eye on parenting decisions, I know that we both are doing the best we can and that we care deeply about our children’s well-being. We attend our children’s schools conferences and sports games together and at times are able to celebrate our children’s lives together.

And, at the same time, my business is soaring. As a Collaborative Divorce Attorney, Mediator, Coach, Trainer, and Nonviolent CommunicationSM facilitator I have taught hundreds of parents these skills so they too can thrive in their lives. I have also shared these tools with divorce professionals for their own use and to share with their clients.

“Now I want to help YOU enjoy these results. . . so you have more peace in your life. . .”

In my Parenting Effectively Through Divorce Program, you will learn  essential skills to help build a safe house for love so you and your children can thrive . . .

“Working with Cat Zavis helped turn a low point in my adult life into something positive. The difference today compared to our last three years of marriage is next to a miracle and I can contribute a large portion of this success to working with Cat. Thank you.”       ~ Mark Goodman


Typically, divorce creates separation and alienation.  Families breakdown, friendships can be affected and even connection with one’s children changes.  

From my personal and professional experience, I have learned that there is a different way to navigate divorce and that even just one of the parents can make a huge difference in how children (and parents) experience divorce.  Rather than deepening separation and alienation, divorce can be seen as a restorative process – one where the losses of the family members can be restored. 

I have learned some key ways to transform the sense of alienation and separation into healing and restoration. Empathy and Understanding. 

I have created the Parenting Effectively Through Divorce Program to provide parents the skills and tools they need to transform divorce from a model of alienation and separation to a model of empathy and understanding, whereby healing and restoration are possible.

This program is for you if you want to:

  • Ensure your children are not placed in the middle of your disagreements
  • Be in a supportive community of parents who are struggling with the same issues you are
  • Have a thriving home

In this program, you will learn how to:

  • ensure your children are at the center, rather than in the middle, of your conversations
  • support your children so they can love both parents
  • let your children and your former navigate their own relationships
  • create a powerful “Support for Self” Action Plan
  • create agreements that place the children’s needs first
Hear the inspiring transformations that happen for people who learn these skills:

“Thank you for your guidance through our process…we were able to navigate through with your help and have become better friends and parents to our son.” ~K.Q.


“Working with Cat Zavis helped turn a low point in my adult life into something positive.”

“While struggling with the emotional turmoil of a divorce settlement Cat was able to help my ex-wife and I experience a few hours of unencumbered clear communications. Her unique approach to conflict resolution enabled us to agree on a parenting plan and division of assets which left to our own damaged pride would have never been accomplished.

I was so impressed by the technique she has mastered I enrolled in two of the communication workshops she offers. Working with Cat has been a gift and has taught me the tools needed to be an empathetic listener, to express my own needs and how to get these needs met.

It has been three years since the divorce and my relationship with my ex-wife is amiable. It is with great relief to me that today we are able to communicate in a healthy way and provide our child with two healthy homes. The difference today compared to our last three years of marriage is next to a miracle and I can contribute a large portion of this success to working with Cat. Thank you.” ~ Mark Goodman

“When I first met Cat, my husband and I were at the end of our marriage. Every discussion turned into an argument and I had a very hard time knowing whether I’d been heard or not. We had a strong need to communicate and reach agreements as we had young children whose welfare we wanted to prioritize throughout the divorce and afterwards.

Both of us were experiencing a strong disconnection from each other, and a great deal of pain and mistrust. We were on our third marriage counselor and at a standstill. That is when we turned to Cat. Cat’s work gave us a structure that we could follow and use to actually get somewhere. After just one session, we were not only able to use the format she taught us but also have the presence of mind to actually do so. By using these tools we were able to speak and listen to each other despite our strong emotions and the chaos in our relationship.

These tools were like a life raft that we could count on. We wanted to be able to communicate clearly in order to separate our lives and make the best parenting choices possible for our children.

Cat had an intelligent, kind, and skillful ability to understand what each of us was saying. She coached us to be able to speak with each other in ways that we could hear at the most devastating period in our lives.

She stayed neutral, positive and optimistic. She was patient, deeply focused and committed to following our process to a place of mutual understanding.

It’s been four years since our first session with Cat. My (now) former husband and I meet regularly to discuss parenting issues. When we disagree and are struggling, we use the skills Cat taught us so we can focus on our shared goals rather than our disagreements. This has helped make the transition easier for our kids.

Not only have these tools helped me parent with my kids’ dad, but I also use these tools in all my relationships and interactions both in work and as a parent. I am enthusiastically discovering how much they help create a quality of mutual understanding so that we can co-create outcomes that work for everyone involved.

Learning from and being coached by Cat Zavis has deeply enriched my life. I now have the tools and experience that give me courage to communicate calmly in difficult situations while staying true to myself. I also have the confidence to show up to people I encounter in all kinds of situations, and am optimistic that I can nurture compassion for everyone in my life.” ~ Sarah Clark


“Thank you. This morning my husband and I initiated a new way of communicating with each other thanks to the skills I am learning and have learned under your loving, compassionate tutelage. These tools are already being put to use in my life and home. I have a deep sense of gratitude for you and the work you are doing in the world, and how it is enriching my life.” ~ Carolyn Hallett, homeopathic practitioner


Your compassionate listening and empathic way of sharing information and skills were PHENOMENAL! You should write a book: “Beyond Tact: Peacemaking under Duress!” Really, really nice job.” ~ Virginia Herrick, spiritual community member, writer, editor and designer 

“You created a space where intense and complicated interactions could be explored with full respect. Your feedback offered very valuable perspective into the way I interact with the people around me.

I was especially impressed by the depth of your insight. Since the workshop, I have practiced the techniques you shared with us, and I have clearly felt the benefits.

My clients seem to feel more heard, my personal boundaries have improved, and I have generally been more calm, and more present with the people around me.” ~ Ruthie V., artist


Even divorce professionals with years of experience have used these tools to help themselves and their clients:


“I hired Cat J. Zavis to give a three-day training to my local group consisting of attorneys and mental health providers. It was important to me to have Cat teach our group because she brings unique talents and skills in conflict resolution and Nonviolent CommunicationSM that I believe are critical in our work. Before the training, we often struggled with clients, and even collaborative members [within our group], stuck in disagreements and positions without any clear way to move through them. After the training, my colleagues and I had a common language and ability to communicate that allowed us to seamlessly transform our clients’ positions and disagreements into their shared goals and solutions that would work for both of them. It was truly amazing.~ Mark Springfield, Collaborative Attorney, North Carolina


“I’ve used Cat to facilitate interactions between attorneys. Her insights were deep, her performance professional and she may have saved the case from self-destruction. That was years ago, but just this week I reviewed materials she wrote about communication and used those ideas to help a participant in a collaborative [divorce] case improve her communication. Cat has an uncanny ability to quickly assess a situation and to offer paradigm-shifting advice. She is a valuable resource to you as a mediator, facilitator, trainer and attorney. I wish my practice was closer to her so we could work together more.” ~ Glenn Tanner, Collaborative Attorney, Spokane, WA


I understand that you want to make it a no-brainer for me so you are going to make the program risk free.

I can participate in the first two weeks of the Program and if I feel I’m not getting the value you promised, I can ask for my entire tuition back!

I’m assured this online transaction is 100% secure and after my information is received I will get an electronic receipt and instructions within a few minutes.

If you are ready to create real changes in your home so your children thrive, click on the link below to register for the Parenting Effectively Through Divorce Program

Register me NOW!

Program Details

This program consists of:

6 live calls of 2 hours each during which time you will be taught the skills, be guided and coached in how to use them, and have opportunities to practice them so you can implement them in your life immediately (you will be given access to the recordings of each call in case you are unable to participate and so you can listen again and again)

Dates: 6 Mondays (2nd and 4th Mondays of the month), June 11th, June 25th, July 9th, July 23rd, August 13th, August 27th

Time: 4:00pm PST (5:00pm MST, 6:00pm CST, 7:00pm EST)

A workbook with all of the exercises to support your practice along with weekly “homework” assignments to encourage and support you every step of the way

And a supportive community where you will have the opportunity to further practice and learn these tools so you have them in your toolbox when you really need them most – in interactions with your Ex.

“Provide a safe house for your children through divorce . . .”

In the Parenting Effectively Through Divorce Program, you’ll get my proven system to help you stay calm and parent more effectively so you can your children can thrive.

What is this worth to you?

Are you ready to…

  • Learn concrete tools that will create real results
  • Stop bumping your head against a brick wall and do things differently
  • Be effective in your communication with your Ex
  • Stop fighting and focus on your shared goals
  • Make the changes necessary so your children thrive even more
  • Get support so you don’t have to do it on your own

If your heart is saying YES, you are ready for this program.

The value of this Program is $786.00 – a tiny investment to have the tools to help you support your children during and after divorce so they and you thrive.

I want you to experience a dramatic shift in your home and I want to reward you for quick committed action and make it really easy for you to say YES. The special early bird discount is just $293.

Register Me Now

“Sounds great, Cat, but my Ex is the problem and I’ve tried a zillion things already.”

I get it. You want to support your children but you think it takes two to tango. But you know what?

It’s so easy to trap yourself in the belief that unless my Ex changes, nothing will change. If you don’t do anything different, nothing will change. You’re going to continue to struggle and wish things would change.

But you CAN break out of this cycle. You just need to show your commitment by investing a little more energy. Take the steps to change your experience and find more peace in your life with a proven model.

The only person who’s going to make your dream a reality is YOU and it starts here.

How long do you want to wait to get results? This program teaches you the tools and skills to hear and connect with yourself so you have the power to provide a loving, safe home for your children whether your Former ever changes.

So there’s really no excuse! You belong in this program, and deserve the support of this community. These 12 amazing weeks will change your life. Go ahead and do it, you’ll be so glad you did!


Yes Cat, I’m ready to be the best parent I can be!
Save my space in the Parenting Effectively Through Divorce Program.


Special Early Bird Investment: $293 (ends May 14th)

Please click “add to cart” and choose your payment option on the next page.

Rest easy – your order will be processed on secure servers.
You will receive an electronic receipt within a few minutes.


Still Have Questions?

Ask me any question about the Parenting Effectively Through Divorce Program, and I’ll help you get clear so you know if it’s the right fit for you.

Your Name (required)

Your Email (required)

Ask Your Question

You are very important to us. Once you submit your question, a knowledgeable member of the Stop Yelling, Start Communicating team will contact you personally to provide answers about our program.